A True Story of a
Woman Stuck in a Man's Body
This page is written to hopefully help people like myself who have a hard time living in the role of their birth gender but don't want to change gender on account of a life full of hassles afterwards. Let's face it, this world is a world full of opinionated individuals, some with traditional out of date judgmental attitudes and most non accepting of people who were born as being different to them. I know that I was born into the wrong sex role and am convinced that I am female in every way when it comes to gender roles. However various constraints placed upon people like myself have made it extremely hard to live as the correct gender. Here is my story.
I was born in Australia in a normal family with two brothers and a sister with two relatively Church going parents. The earliest memory I have of fanaticising about being a girl was some time in early primary school. In America, I think you call this elementary school, but am not sure. Around the age of five years of age my sister used to dress me in female clothes and put make up on my face and I used to love it. I didn't want to take the dresses and make up off as it felt so natural.
This progressed in life while entering high school, I would often find myself going to my sisters room and trying on some of her clothes. I've dreamt about living as a girl basically all my life. I once saw the story of Martina Navratilova's coach [ed.- Renee' Richards] on tv when I was young which depicted the life of a famous transsexual. This made me realise for the first time that a person could have get their sex changed. I straight away wanted to have a sex change but knew I'd have to wait until I was old enough with a steady income flowing in to support the costly procedure.
This all sounds so straight forward and easy, but I could not be further from the truth to say it was easy. I have felt embarrassment throughout my life up until recently about the issue when I was going through denial phases. I can remember going as long as six months without wearing womans clothes. At first I couldn't help being sexually excited by wearing the clothes but eventually they felt more and more natural. To this day I still find myself wearing female clothes all the time, although I no longer venture out in public with these clothes on. When at home by myself I will often live in my true gender role but have not yet told my family of my situation. I am sure they know of my status as they have seen the abundance of female clothes in my wardrobe and are aware of the situation but have never asked me about them.
I am at a stage now where I have accepted my sex organs as they are until I can afford to begin to think about a sex change operation or living as my true gender. I do not think this will ever happen due to the pressures of society placed upon a person like me. What people say about me doesn't bother me as I realise the people who say bad things just don't understand. It is the employment, marriage and children issue which is preventing me from ever changing sex. I do one day hope to have at least two children and a wife. I also want to find a job overseas as a female that I was born to be. This however is unlikely, considering my profession as a teacher. Thus the world has won for now in preventing me to live as my true self, but I hope to one day change to be the person I was meant to be.
Today, I am still wearing women's clothes occasionally and still desire a sex change operation one day. If you are in the same position as me do not hesitate to email me at email@example.com and we can talk about your situation. If you are contemplating having a sex change operation, talk to someone who has had one and is living as a female or male now. A lot of people are living very happy fulfilled lives, but many are also struggling. I feel that one has to prepare for the worst but live for the best. Therefore realise your life maybe a living nightmare as is the case for many a person like us or it may be what you've always dreamt living in the other sex may be. I know myself, that I intend to one day have the operation but also plan to have a family with a secure income before hand. I hope together we can change the way the way the world feels towards normal people like me.
Write to Lisa